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| Sunday, July 24, 2005 |
| Blessed Change |
Tonight was the last night in the current space and first night in our new borrowed space for my church. It's strange. I didn't feel the sense of loss I thought I would tonight. The old space seemed so empty, but it didn't feel like the church was even there anymore. It was like all the people and the things that made up the church I know were in the new space. I just expected to feel more nostalgic about the old space. Guess I'm growing up and learning to deal with change better.
There are familiar faces and things surrounding us in the new space to make it feel like home. And though the new space is decidedly less bohemian than our last one, it already seems to fit us well. This move is also inspiring some personal changes in how I'm living my life, what I'm pursuing and the goals I'm setting for myself. Lately I've been less concerned about controlling the situations around me. I'm trying to fill my time with things and people I enjoy and stop worrying too much about the future.
I haven't found myself moved to tears of joy in years. But I did tonight. As the closing song was sung and the refrain of Amens was repeating, the sun broke free and flooded through stain glass at the rear of the space, lighting up the center of our circle and shining on the faces of those I have come to know and love. It was as though God was letting us know that he was still there with us, even in the uncertainty and even in an unfamiliar space. "God special effects" as some friends called it. And to see the faces of those around me light up and heads turn toward the flooding light, I felt a stirring within, a warming sensation of love. It sounds cheesy, but I used to get those feelings back in the camp days seeing a chapel full of kids with arms outstretched singing their little hearts out about how much they loved and needed Jesus. I remember being choked up past the point of loosing my voice on one such occassion.
Mark this move and what it's teaching me as one more milestone in my process towards growing up. |
posted by Jen @ 11:55 PM   |
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| 1 Comments: |
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A big AMEN to that one Jen!!!
slf
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A big AMEN to that one Jen!!!
slf